Happy Birthday Mickey

He would have been 28 today. It wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. I told myself this morning that he is having the best birthday ever. He is looking upon the face of the Lord, he is a place of total happiness, total acceptance, total joy and elation. He is having a much better time than we possibly could here on earth. I don't see why they wouldn't celebrate birthdays in Heaven, to remember the day that God sent them into the world to learn about Him, to learn to glorify Him. In that same respect, they must celebrate the day of death for their step into God's existance, the day the went home to be with their Creator.

I want everyone to read the book A Travel Guide to Heaven by Anthony Destefano. While I don't agree with everything he says, or the way he skirts around somethings, it really is a helpful book to give us hope about Heaven. To give us a more concrete idea of what Heaven is, what Mickey and other loved ones are experiencing. I'd also appreciate any other suggetions for books about Heaven or paradise, etc. I also suggest a book called Eli, from the same author of the Face of God. It is hard for many people to imagine Jesus and his walk on the earth because we are so far disconnected from that history, that time period, etc. A lot of the details are lost on us because we don't totally understand the culture and the structure of their society. In Eli, it is as Christ did not come back 2000 years ago, but instead came back in the present time. Instead of being Jesus, a form of Joshua, he is Eli. He was born in a hotel laundry room as there was no room in the hotel for his parents to have a room there. It is very interesting and really helped me understand some important details that really make a difference in the understanding of Jesus and his ministry.

This morning when we woke up, we talked about what we wanted to do. I had already bought a silk autumn floral/leaf wreath to hang there. The two older boys wrote notes/made birthday cards for Mickey, and I did also. We rolled them up and put them inside balloons. Then we blew the balloons up with left over helium. At around 11 am, we went to the cemetary. The first thing I did was remove the cross that had been there. THe flowers were dead, the styrofoam was starting to rot, and it had fallen over. We replaced that with the wreath. I asked the boys if they wanted to sing "Happy Birthday" but the did not. Instead we went over to a clearing and let the balloons go. They went up forever and it was really neat. Micah likes to sing songs and he sang something about Daddy having his birthday in Heaven with Jesus. We then went to lunch in the village, played in the park, and went to the library. When we got home we had to bury a cat that had been hit by a car in front of the property. Micah again sang a song about the kitty dying and being in heaven with Daddy. James didn't want him to, but we told James to leave Micah alone because singing helps him. We later had a birthday party to go to for our chiropractor/friend's son. It was at a big bounce house fun place. The boys had a lot of fun. As soon as we got back I went to growth group at church. Shane and Wendy, and Matt came over to watch the season premiere of The Office, and then mom and I watched the season premiere of Grey's Anatomy. Then I finished the book A Travel Guide to Heaven, which I started this morning, and now I am writing this. Keeping busy is good.

There is a part of that book that I really appreciated. When Jesus arrived and discovered that Lazarus was dead, and saw his friend's grief at losing their brother, he cried too. He not only cried, he wept, he grieved, his heart broke. We all know what the feeling is. Even though Jesus knew that he could raise Lazarus, which he did, he still knew the feeling. While we have all the hope in the world for Heaven, for what comes after this world, just as Jesus had, He is God, he still couldn't overcome those feelings of desperate grief. God knows what our pain is, and like the book said, I can't help but think that he grieves for us too, knowing our desperate pain and heartbreak. The night Mickey died, and the night after, we had some pretty big thunder/rain storms. Those nights I couldn't help but think that God was crying for me, and just maybe he was.

So, I want to say "Mickey, I know you had the happiest birthday ever. I know you would have liked to have us there, but you were with Jesus, with other loved ones and friends, and we remembered you and loved you here. We will see you again someday soon. Meanwhile give Jesus a hug for me and Jesus give Mickey a hug for me."